Comments on: Scattered http://www.haggardandhalloo.com/2010/01/22/scattered/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=scattered Publishing Creative and Contemporary Writing Tue, 07 Feb 2012 03:47:14 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Quasimofo http://www.haggardandhalloo.com/2010/01/22/scattered/comment-page-1/#comment-2049 Quasimofo Fri, 22 Jan 2010 23:37:35 +0000 http://www.haggardandhalloo.com/?p=5854#comment-2049 Apostrophoe alliteration of l's (and later m's)in opening line really show sense of sound in the beauty of the spoken word: "Cur(l)ing a(l)ong a draw(l) tied to tongue a(l)ongside the f(l)owing water’s current were sparks of a greater (m)eaning as gli(mm)ers do a(m)ong co(ll)ective rivers:" [Apostrophoe alliteration is usually distinguished from the mere repetition of the same sound in positions other than the beginning of each word — whether a consonant, as in "some mammals are clammy" (consonance)] I believe this line is an opening metaphor for the ensuing social analysis/Nietzche-like quotation: “Nothing divides a people who strive in common like the trampling actions just beyond the merest acknowledgment of a group’s collective power taking precedence over what contentment the people strove to attain individually.” Individual vs. group as an existentialist motiff in poetry--nice touch! Rest of the poem expounds upon this theme/idea poetically incorporating some snazzy alliteration and interesting multi-syllable words like 'equilibristic' in combination with one syllable finishing touches like 'calm'...makes reader feel as if he/she has received tablets from Mt. Sinai written from a higher cognative mesh of erudition and imagination. Personally,the impression i get from the poem is that the masses (majority of mankind)have fucked up and are about to, or should, be flushed down the toilet. hmm. This is just my 1st/2nd reading though so others may discern differently. Thx so much for sharing! Apostrophoe alliteration of l’s (and later m’s)in opening line really show sense of sound in the beauty of the spoken word:
“Cur(l)ing a(l)ong a draw(l) tied to tongue a(l)ongside the f(l)owing water’s current were sparks of a greater (m)eaning as gli(mm)ers do a(m)ong co(ll)ective rivers:” [Apostrophoe alliteration is usually distinguished from the mere repetition of the same sound in positions other than the beginning of each word — whether a consonant, as in "some mammals are clammy" (consonance)]
I believe this line is an opening metaphor for the ensuing social analysis/Nietzche-like quotation: “Nothing divides a people who strive in common like the trampling actions just beyond the merest acknowledgment of a group’s collective power taking precedence over what contentment the people strove to attain individually.” Individual vs. group as an existentialist motiff in poetry–nice touch! Rest of the poem expounds upon this theme/idea poetically incorporating some snazzy alliteration and interesting multi-syllable words like ‘equilibristic’ in combination with one syllable finishing touches like ‘calm’…makes reader feel as if he/she has received tablets from Mt. Sinai written from a higher cognative mesh of erudition and imagination. Personally,the impression i get from the poem is that the masses (majority of mankind)have fucked up and are about to, or should, be flushed down the toilet. hmm. This is just my 1st/2nd reading though so others may discern differently.

Thx so much for sharing!

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