Plasticized Snoot
by pat a physics
If you take me apart piece by piece,
arrange my spine not in a linear pattern,
but circular. You can spell things out
with my bones, paint with my blood,
and use tendons to …

The Company Picnic
by pat a physics
The freezedry technique they used was quite convenient for someone who
would jacknife around the globe.  And the selection of foods they offered
might razzledazzle even the taste makers who discredit this …

one hundred and first
by pat a physics
Appealing light was making its way through my room.
The quality spoke to me, and told me everything I know.
That there was a snag in the way things are run …

all bets are off
by pat a physics
It stirred something deep within the snowman version of me
to see you at work, pissed, with too much mascara on
while everyone was at the barn, drinking and dancing.
Thrusting a …

Old Burber Greaves
Written by Sam, Pat, Gene, and Rosemary by playing writing roulette on 12/28/09.
Tori Amos was sick. She had a light heart that whimpered when
squeezed. Lenny Kravitz held her hand gently. …

As Cool As I Could
by pat a physics
Both pans were precariously leaning toward the edge of the counter
when I noticed the phone ringing.  My dead wife would tell you
that I always answer the phone, even …

The Launderer
by pat a physics
At night, when I hold the bag over my shoulder,
I need to put it down because it is bulging with clothes.
Make it all evaporate, turn the clothes into air.
Gloves into snow …

unfair mousse
by pat a physics
Hair can tell you most of what you want to know.  Thomas Gluckford’s head
was a gray fan in the back and a slick, sewer rat in front.  Tom smelled worse
than the …

finding gene
by pat a physics
Where did Gene Wilder go? Is he in a suburban neighborhood making cocktails and flirting with the Golden Girls? I miss him. He is a beacon of truth. …

Pentagonal Radiance
by pat a physics
I was in the middle of eating a tall dessert in the lap of the laughing people
when my candlesticks were firmly stuck in the ground
for the drunken, frolicking big wigs to …

Melted Candy
by pat a physics
Today she was swirling a mixture of cognac and twilight
her skin shone like a seal
she asked us undo-able favors in the darkened foyer
while her pets went ballistic.
Her eyes were a child-actors …

The Octopus and the Ultra-Perm
by pat a physics
Grace. The tinkling of silverware is the dinner bell of my
universe. My subscription to your thoughts needs to be renewed
here at the table. False alarms …

Country Drive
by pataphysics
A thin wire fence was barely perceptible in the dark when
we pulled the car to the side of the road. I switched off the
headlights and listened to the rest of the music. …

Big Anthony
by pataphysics
A word bubble came out of a lamp post giving me directions on
where to get a good beer in town. Thanking the lamp post was
arduous. I had to sketch a thank …

25 Lighters
by pat a physics
My poor neighbor died yesterday from a heart attack and
I couldn’t stop myself from trespassing in his yard.  He
had all of these trees that were shooting out of these
chickenwire stone enclosures …

Oh! Head of Heads
by pat a physics
A gigantic head was looking at me today. There was no body,
only a head. The head was Hispanic and in pain. I wish I could
have thought …

Pie
by pataphysics
You are probably wondering about the clown nose. Well, I have my clowny side, you see. I’m not always a serious guy. Don’t say that you have seen this before. …

Everything Will Remain Purple
by pat a physics
There were the three of us. There was Gretchen and me. Aldo had come home with us from work. We were not having …

Slurp
by pataphysics
Clinging to her lip, the straw is now an appendage
rushing sugar water toward her face
the straw was dancing between her two fingers
controlled with a tap, tap, tapping
the cup was positioned diagonally to her posture
and …

I Don’t Want You
by Pataphysics
Ahem, this is Larry Lopswann.
Hello, Larry. This is Billy. You gave me your card the other day, and I thought I’d call you.
Who is this?
Billy. It’s Billy. …

Motherfuckers
by pataphysics
Electric tape covered more than just the razor blades,
it covered the instant oatmeal and the wet paint.
My doctor addressed me by my surname like a coach
and he was told about my aversion to labels.
Opaque …

Coos Bay
by pat a physics
Rocky, green lids on top of jelly fish eyes
biking with trembling hands after a night of whisky
and sleeping bag sleep rocks.
Talking apparatus without batteries installed
gliding swiftly amidst the sound of barking …

My Boner is Screaming Hello
marquee rearrangement, photo, poem by pat a physics
Everybody dies.
Last night I died,
I died laughing.
My dreams make,
and have made it.
I made no sense.
Right there
on there
from where?
Before you sleep,
you have slept,
and are sleeping.
Catch …

Gravity in Pearls
by pat a physics
When the fires are oftener
kneel in the these matresses
because the mattress sneezed
the ketchup trees are imaginary
and you’re listening to jealous it
foundered under blue greens
space is very ripe with gravities
gravitational stone …

Human Cannonball
by pataphysics
The canister is too tight, but somehow I squeeze into it backward. It is like that guy who has no collarbone saving baby Jessica. My collarbone might have broken, but I …

Review of a Water Balloon Fight
by pat a physics
On the night of June 8th, there was a wonderful water balloon fight at my friend Richard’s house. We got the idea because Eileen was getting …

Tin Clouds
by pat a physics
The note had been stuck to the bottom of an old leather-back chair in your living room. The chair had always been in your living room, and had belonged to …

click image to see video
Instead of Blinking
by pat a physics
Nameless chickenman of my hallucination with your sunglasses on the sun, you are staring at us without a beak on your face. Your beak is …

You’re Fired!
by pat a physics
Leona Helmsley was a terrible bitch. She treated people so cruelly that her hair turned from silver to black again. Her mean streak was primarily in effect in this …

Over and Out
by pat a physics
Hi! How are you doing?
Oh, good, that’s good to hear. Can I help you with your hair?
No, I have no problem. Especially not to-day. It is …