first date

First Date
by christopher barnes

These dams
     On which we edge
                 That star –
            Studded lip,
My temper tingles.
Look at the long range –
                        An eagle leering.
Are promises shocked.
Those bell-bottoms tighten.
Breath-spent impatience.

0 thoughts on “first date

  1. It took a little while to get a feeling for this one, but i let my mouse wander laocodaisically in it’s maze, and was gisted gradually. For a poem entitled ‘First Date’, i was certainly thrown off (in a good way) upon reading that first line about the dams and being on the edge of them causing a sort of suffocation for the daters…at first, i thought it was the dams personified suffocating, ha! silly me.
    They say that eyes are windows into the soul, but here, it is ‘that star – studded lip’–and that makes total sense since there’s usually a lot of talking between potential lovers to get to know each other. With ‘My temper tingles’, i wasn’t sure if this was an anxiety thing or a temperament stimulation…hmmm, what do you think Cerebella?
    ‘Look at the long range – an eagle leering.’ i suddenly get an impression of the mindset and tension of a dater attempting to remain focused on the positive and to have fun.
    The last part of poem also gives me that, oh, glimpse into the predicament / situation. Do they kiss? Or has the writer lost his cool becoming obsessed (but we’re back on the lips, aren’t we?) The ‘bell-bottoms tighten’–impressive visual image with dual meaning perhaps … outlook of writer becomes narrowed, and no getting off the pants tonight.
    And finally, ‘Come-again-chaos,/ Breath-spent impatience’…ah, it’s just too much to handle, the writer gives up due to exhaustion dealing with this self-induced stress. This is just one interpretation. Any others?
    The typeset was different with this poem and the spacing out of the ordinary and there was an interesting use of hyphen which all had me visually pleased.

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