The Horse Dick Saloon

The Horse Dick Saloon
by reed posey
Mickey Mantle drinks scotch
Sets his drink on the Mantle
Maybe it leaves a little ring
Babe Ruth drinks scotch
Talks about the time:
Swung his donkey bat
At the left field wall
Bludgeon you with his donkey bat
Piss and cum and wine and vinegar
And mirth and myrrh arch out the tip when real true contact wakes it up
Flows like wine
Mickey:
Yeah, Babe,
But you swung at everything
Homerun King, sure
But also, like, “strike you’re out”
Boom, “strike you’re out”
“Strike, you’re out”
Long Pause
“Strike ONE”
“Strike TWO”
And so on
I’m Babe Goddamn Ruth
Horse Dick Adonis
Flapity-Jack the Conjurer
Manipulator, commanding the common yield to the SPLENDID
Splitting The Crack of Dawn
Splitting it like The Crack of The Goddamn Bat
Spitting huge mouthfuls of vinegar tobacco spit into the ocean, who is my only true competition