cinnamon toast crunch.

cinnamon toast crunch.
by ajezzy
today my grandma asked me how my weekend was, i wanted to tell her how
i would stumble from tequila shot to tequila shot. how i met a nameless jordan who threw me against the alley wall, cracking ribs. how he pounded me over and over whispering how cheap i was how i wasn’t worth the money. he would leave me to stare at my purple thighs and pass out an hour later.
but i just told her it was fine.
today the drug therapist asked me if and how i planned to kill myself. i wanted to tell her how
i would drive down 280 with my step dad bound in the backseat so he would finally see what he has driven me to. halfway down i would throw myself against the concrete wall. my face pealing off my skull like shells to hard boiled eggs. the ambulance would show up but i’d be gone. luke and matt from st. marys would drive, if only to honk the horn at my stilled heart. they would look at my shriveled body and talk about how this time they weren’t important.
but i told her i didn’t know.