I Was So Poor
I Was So Poor
by gene defcon
I was so poor
Santa gave me food
I was so poor
I could only afford used money
I was so poor
That instead of a brand new phone
Momma said just call using a brand new voice
I was so poor
My nickname was “Cajun Sandwich”
I was so poor
My real name was Donald Tramp
I was so poor
I watched that movie “Heat” to stay warm
I was so poor
I couldn’t even support rats
I was so poor
I collected food stamps
(Even the ones that weren’t rare)
I was so poor
I had to tear my coupons ‘cuz scissors were for rich folk
I was so poor
I dumpster-dove a hobo camp
I was so poor
I had one of those puffed-out air-bellies
I was so poor
I thought tip-jars were for tipping over
I was so poor
I put cheese on my friend’s Mac and tried to eat it
I was so poor
I used Pesos at the Dollar Store
I was so poor
the world wasn’t out to get me; I was out to get the world
I was so poor
what it was I didn’t have had to be described to me until I pretended to understand
I was so poor
I only had disposable income
I was so poor
feelings of anger made me laugh
I was so poor
I wore other peoples smiles and borrowed laughter
I was so poor
feeling hungry comes with nostalgia
I was so poor
extravagant bastards walked around in the shoes I just bought
I was so poor
going barefoot meant the skin had grown back
I love this game…thank you Gene
LOL this was so good, i keep laughing because i donlt know what else to do with myself. except read it again. it’ like a pardoxal experience. thank you.
blech. sorry for typos. on the cell phone screen the comment box shows up like a little slit but i have thoughts to get across so i just work around it LOL
Not positive but that last line sounds very Gene Defcon. Very… authentic human-ish lol.
I forgot how much reading @ Haggard & Halloo can be.
My two pesos: “I Was So Poor” is much meatier than “Old Cow Cone”, which stands as an atrocious disregard for Mother Goose rhymes. If we were all picking partners for a tag team round of dozens, I’d pick Defcon based on this witty ditty alone.