tumbling
Tumbling
by Nathaniel Kostar
My car battery died last week without warning.
Then, I lost the keys to my brother’s car
He didn’t have a spare
The stars are all fucked up, they’re making me dizzy
And Verizon just shut off the cable
(and they’re singing dollar dollar bills on the radio
Apparently, it’s not cool anymore to be poor)
I’ve swallowed Milky Ways of misfortune,
And yesterday in Chicago they beat an honor roll student to death
With four by fours and the bottoms of boots—
Someone put the video on AOL
I could hardly watch
I haven’t seen a rapper yet as hard as the boards and boots that beat that boy to death,
And I’ve been staring at this screen all day at work and cannot find an ounce of god
Everyone’s grumpy here around my cubicle,
Tumbling in the filth of life.
Their dreams are burning holes into their thighs
‘cause they’ve worked all week and still can’t pay the bills
And in Chicago they beat smart boys to death
And little girls eat stray bullets in Trenton,
I’ve read all about it on the front page
And even the poets are lost tumbling in the filth of life,
Searching for the perfect words to say
It’s all fucked up and yet still beautiful
Thank god my baby holds me tighter than today (her
Skin is warm as heaven) and she squeezes me like I’m dying, like
I’m leaving—and I know I probably will
There certainly is a lot of filth in life and it would seem always that our civilization is in a constant state of decay and decline–just waiting for the last sputtering and dying breath. Even in so-called ‘Golden Ages’ like, let’s say the 1950’s during the hey-day of the American Dream, i’m sure there were people looking around and thinking something similar–“Things are going to shit!”.
It’s a reocurring theme that weighs in our minds when we ponder quality of life and what’s in store for our children. I think the poet has rendered an original enough perspective of this collective concern and has expressed it in a way that resounds with us. Much fear, hopelessness, futility, and downright impending doom penetrate thru my eyes searing my faith in man’s ability to raise the human condition while i read this piece.
First 12 lines are epic! Well done. Mention of poets is true to life: “And even the poets are lost tumbling in the filth of life,
Searching for the perfect words to say It’s all fucked up and yet still beautiful”. Poets celebrate suffering so good, don’t they? lol. Great finish: “Thank god my baby holds me tighter than today (her Skin is warm as heaven) and she squeezes me like I’m dying, like I’m leaving—and I know I probably will”. mmm. It all boils down to finding that one person you can love, confide in, share your life with to make it all worthwhile–but even that fades eventually in so many cases. Positive world outlook is a difficult thing to come by. …and blowing smoke up one’s own ass if a difficult trick to master. Why did God create the world the way he did? Is there even a God? Good stuff to think about–only if you’re drunk.