by Pat A Physics
When you have gone to the movie almost every day for a year, and the concessions girl
knows your first name, that’s when it’s time to consider your career. Ask her on a date,
sure, but don’t forget to make up an impressive title for yourself.  Art director, creative
consultant, system administrator.  Be prepared to speak about it for five minutes and then
change the subject.  If she insists on talking shop, get real quiet.  Make sure to suggest the
outdoors.  Have some cigarettes handy and offer her one.  When she takes it, light it up.
Sit facing away from her as she talks about her job.  Interject meaningful comments and
remember to look for a way to segue.  If the opportunity never presents itself, use some

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