your maker
zombie plague
you eat my brain
yours works just fine
but you make nothing
you crave everything
but you make nothing
besides more like you
that need more brains
to make up stuff
stories, music, facts
religion, it really doesn’t matter
you crave it all
eat it up without a fork
enjoy move on
watch enjoy move on
listen share watch move on
read laugh share move on
you make nothing
but more like you
your tastes are decided
and what you want
is inside someones head
the day you decide
something for yourself
is the day it will finally happen
you refuse to line up for it
refuse to pay for it
refuse to wait
snap
crack open the skull
to take it all in
pure without color
sound, or words
the very experience
of living without
without thinking
fully realized
the taste on your tongue
the entire story
made by you, finally
making something
the news
I had included a white text bit and “the news” but decided against it before this was accepted. Please exclude these elements in readings…I would otherwise have deleted them. Thank you.
Haha! Loved the 2nd person perspective here warning against outer body consumerism. The whole piece seemed more ‘every day speak’ and was shorter than usual in line length and body. Nice change-up. I also appreciated your signature invisi-diglossia towards the end–it always adds that element of discovery, of exploration, of enlightenment.
Also, it’s so very good to see a regular contributor writer who has been active in ‘giving back’ to the site in the form of feedback towards other writers. I wish others were as active as you. There’s a big difference between active dialogue and a living passion for poetry as opposed to a lifeless message board. Thanks for your activeness!
The rhythm in this piece is supurb. It keeps going and doesn’t stop for anything. The lines ending with “move on” are particularly effective. Yet I can’t help but feel that they are alluding to moveon.org. Was that intended?
I was not aware of that site.